merry christmas!

my first log cake!!! check it out!! haha. tpl gave me that santa sitting next to the mushrooms.

last night the rain spoke to me

this rainy day feels so right for one of my favorites....


Last Night the Rain Spoke to Me

Last night
the rain
spoke to me
slowly, saying,
what joy
to come falling
out of the brisk cloud,
to be happy again
in a new way
on the earth!
That’s what it said
as it dropped,
smelling of iron,
and vanished
like a dream of the ocean
into the branches
and the grass below.
Then it was over.
The sky cleared.
I was standing
under a tree.
The tree was a tree
with happy leaves,
and I was myself,
and there were stars in the sky
that were also themselves
at the moment
at which moment
my right hand
was holding my left hand
which was holding the tree
which was filled with stars
and the soft rain –
imagine! imagine!
the long and wondrous journeys
still to be ours.

- Mary Oliver

the harper lee connection

a series of recent coincidences reminds me of a dating incident some two years back.

at the time, a friend was scheming to set me up with her ex boyfriend's friend, named C.

being the cheeky, fun loving person she is - she gave C some advice prior to meeting me.

"when she asks you what are some of your favorite books... say To Kill a Mockingbird and Hamlet." my friend gives the heads up to my favorite first date question.

the plan would have worked really well - only thing was that my friend 'fessed up to the planted book titles even before C had a chance to deliver his lines. she must have known the power of loving the same books as an effective compatibility tool and may have thought it'd best to back out of girlfriend treason.

Literature, the written word, books... at least the great works have a profound ability to shape our minds and worldview.

they are, no doubt, defining.

as i was browsing blogs the other night - i discovered a harper lee (author of "To Kill A Mockingbird") connection. For a majority of bloggers i connected with in terms of values or views - most had cited Lee's first and only published book as an absolute favorite.

isn't that fascinating? what you read and/or do not read matters. you are what you read.

currently reading: an andy warhol bio and mags, mags & mags.

the gift

The other day at Church, Father Romeo (yes - that's his name) was asking - "As we go about with our shopping for gifts - let us ask ourselves what is it that we hope to give others this Christmas...."

Is it so important - this giving of material gifts?

I've been asking myself this question.

But for all the wrong reasons... mainly 'cos my savings are close to depletion levels. Because I have no more the luxury of spending without thought - I've been thinking of innovative presents this xmas - handmade beaded chains, book thongs etc etc..... that's all i can afford right now. I had to tell my kid brother the other day that i was actually broke and may not be able to fork out $250 for the flat screen LCD TV he was planning to buy for my parents this xmas. it's weird yet humbling telling someone almost 10 years younger than your that u are poorer off than him. In other years - i would have chipped in happily and confidently. i would buy presents without much thought cos money was never an issue.

so of late - i've been mulling about the meaning of gift giving...before Father Romeo's words hit me with the meaning of it all. it's about a gift that even money can't buy -

He said... "let us be the gift to others this Christmas..."

... let us be the gift to others...

Angel

Angel

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
Theres always some reason
To feel not good enough
And its hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
Ill find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
Youre in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there

So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
Theres vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It dont make no difference
Escaping one last time
Its easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
Youre in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there
Youre in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

---- Sarah McLachlan

little miss grumpy

moodmeter:

Hanauma Bay

picture of the moment....

Thinking of Hanauma Bay some 18 years ago.

I remember how clear the water was... how we walked on the reefs and how i thought to myself... that from the shoreline we must have looked like we were walking on water. Just like Jesus. the clear lines of the horizon made walking into the sky seem possible. The sand was super fine - it was sunny and cool at the same time. everything felt and looked fresh. the moment was just like what that Tic Tac television ad promised - some guy bites into a Tic Tac sweet - the mint is bursting with flavor and soon he's skiing down some powdery white snowy slope. Hanauma Bay was like a promise of an untouched place -fresh in every aspect... especially in memory. frozen green peas cupped in my hands - semi submerged - were tickled by colorful fish nibbling away. boogie boards that towered over me and waves that i relished and feared all at once. from afar it looked like a bay of slurpee. it was a delicious time we had.