just like water in a glass

everyone has stories in them. secrets they hold in. love they harbor. old hurts they keep. happiness they can hardly contain. just like water in a glass.

my one weakness is i live in a clear glass. i'm transparent. it's my one strength too....like all other double -edged great shakespearean themes i learnt at 17, but never understood till i became myself a hamlet, an ophelia, gertrude and polonius at varying points in the last decade.

i've recently been told by a certain person that my poems are personal. it was said in a tone rinsed with alarm and caution. (with an echoey feedback of ...."the wholeworld isgonna know you were insanely heartbroken from reading that poem")

the same has been said about some of my blog entries. a close friend recently said: your stuff is so heartwrenching i can barely read it." another self proclaimed open minded person begged for my blog address. i gave it to him only never to hear from him again.

my initial knee jerk responses were usually self-disciplninary in nature. i'd wonder if i've given too much of myself away...as if there might have been something to be ashamed about which in turn drives me to wonder maybe i should sound less intense or less affected. a little more normal...

these lapses of vulnerabilty tend to be fleeting as i return to being me.

my work (poems, prose and that unfinished novel) is personal - it's no accident. i'm a truth addict - graphically, i'm an exhibitionist of emotions. i present the moment as i feel it, see it and experience it.. my work has to be personal, it can only be personal - it comes from insideme. and gives me an avenue for expression...aren;t poems supposed to be personal? if they're not personal then they're just a bunch of words that mean nothing and say nothing much,no?

i believe that there is hardly a disconnect between the said and the unsaid in life that people see and recognize.
when it comes certain core human emotions emanating from lovelost, death, love found..despair..hopelessness....hope etc whether you show it openly or keep it in... the same emotions will still be there. you can't escape from feeling what u do.

you will see me as i am in my good times and bad.

i'm just like water in a glass. a clear glass